How to become an engineer - for dummies

Before i start i would like to say that this post is not for engineering loving people, so i recommend reader discretion........ :D

This is what i found out to be the definition of engineers on wikipedia ....
"An engineer is someone who is trained or professionally engaged in a branch of engineering. Engineers use creativity, technology, and scientific knowledge to solve practical problems. People who work as engineers normally have an academic degree (or equivalent work experience) in one of the engineering disciplines."

Now this is what i feel should be the actual definition of an engineer.......
"An engineer is someone who has studied from mumbai university and at the end always gets placed in an IT company, irrespective of his branch. Engineer uses neither his creativity , sometimes technology and always refers vidyalankar notes for scientific knowledge. At the end he somehow manages to get a degree."

As u enter an engineering college u'll have to cope up with few entities ....

1. Raggers : Well these are usually the so called bullies of an engineering college. They normally pick on the freshers of the college who usually ask them the way to canteen and end up doing weird things.

2. Gossipers : Well i really dont know whether this word exits or not, but this type are the gossip mongers of the college. They are usually chatter boxes making speculations about who is linked to whom.. Mostly girls are involved with this type :D.......(sorry just kidding... :D)

3. The Geeks : They are the nerds of the college... They usually look as if they have the entire world of syllabus to cover , will sit for every lecture... Library is their temple and reference books are their gods... They usually come in formals all the time and oil their hair and will wear thick glasses... U can easily recognize them...

4. Commoners : Well they are the majority in any college(for eg. me) .. Usually get average marks...

5 Teacher's Pet : Well every class has one... He/she usually will ask many questions to teachers just to impress them and the professors end up giving he/she good termwork.. entire class hates him/her......

NOTE : After u become a senior ull either stay a commoner or other entities...

The professors of the college are an obligatory entity, we have to bear them at any cost :D....

The devils of engineers........

1. Mechanics : Well this is first devil ull encounter..... No matter how hard u try no matter how much u study for once u get a kt .... ull feel the entire world is comin down..... Many ppl have fallen into the pits ... becoz of mechanics....(Acche accho ki vat lag gayi hai.)........

2. Professors : As said before they are the obligatory devils of engineering.....

3. Vivas : Well they are the worst of the devils .... perhaps after mechanics ;) ..... They usually work with an external entity called externals ..... Externals are basically evil creatures who are pissed off with life and want to trouble poor students by asking them weird questions..... No matter how much u read they somehow find a question which u think is not in the syllabus ... u will feel to smack the journal on his face and run out of the room :D.......

What is term work ?
Term work is extra marks we get for doing our college work... They totally depend on ur impression with the professors .... If they get pissed by u... sorry ul get less term work....

What is assignmets and writeups ? how do we complete them?
They are basically work given to an engineer.. becoz he has no other work to do.... They are completed by the sincere students ..(usually geeks) and all the other copy from them.... The raggers complete them at the last moment....

Your life is engineering basically revolves around friends , canteen and the nearest tapari (the nearest refreshment point from ur college)... They are your support when u feel bored and left out....... (read this blog) ......

As one of my friends wrote engineering is a 4 yr vacation....... He is damn right.......